Jan 30, 2022) tl;dr it's fine. Maybe better than fine. Is a good label, good price point, good wine for a work-a-day bottle of red. Dark Horse wines are a good drink for the price but if you're thinking about the difference between $9 and $12 for a bottle of wine then maybe this is not the blog for you? Or maybe it is. I do not want to pretend to know what you are like, future reader, and since the current readers stand at zero I apparently am writing this for the Formless Void.
Hello FV! Do you like wine?
I like Katy Perry's music and she seems fun and smart. My daughters both like Katy Perry - one of them ironically (she's 21) and the other sincerely (she's 8). I have several Katy Perry songs on my phone and I am too old to care about listening to musical ironically - I can sing along to quite a few of her songs. She was on SNL tonight! Her back-up dancers looked like Mushrooms but they also looked like Cok-n-Ballz! I suspect the music industry has been HARD on Ms. Perry and she is having the best sense of humor possible.
She has a song called 'Dark Horse'. Maybe TWS should have led with that, but two paragraphs in, here we are. The song is sick and a drip and . . . and it makes me laugh, because there's a build-up like an EDM drop, and then it just smooths out. Like instead of an orgasm it's just plateauing. The Wine Snob's spouse is rolling their eyes right now because I both get it and they think I get it wrong, and I talk WAY too much about it, in TWS-Spouse's eyes, but I know what I know.
Dark Horse Wine. It's good.
I ALSO like Dark Horse Comics because of Flaming Carrot and the Mystery Men. I mean, whatever, they got Buffy and some Star Wars and got bought out so cash money corporate but: "In the full moon, your brain floats to the top of your head. Things will Rip - and Pop - and Come Unglued!"
Seeing as how the median number of views for TWS blog is zero, one might say this is a pre-Dark-Horse blog, too. For the other meaning of dark horse, the kind of meaning from horse racing. And now I feel like I should mention that I have read quite a lot of Charles Bukowski and yes, that does give me some cred. I have even talked, in the past, about his story about an elevator rape being complicated.
Rape is bad. I guess I need to say that? Sometimes stories are complicated though.
As an aside I read Chas. Bukowski for the first time in the same week that I saw an exhibition of G. O'Keefe paintings in Chicago. We listened to Tom Waites in the car the whole time so all three of those people are linked in TWS's hot little
Oh god I am kind of glad no one is reading this now. So, let us talk about the wine - by which I mean I drank this wine and I liked this wine.
I bought this bottle for my mom. She prefers the pink nasties but has a friend who likes good wine.
Here is a tangent about TWS's Mom's librarian friend. We will call her Lin because that's close to her name and because blah blah blah I am mostly through two bottles of wine so bish be Lin now. Lin is a retired Librarian so you best listen when she talks about censorship, and her son went to school with TWS's brother. Now you know Lin. I bought this bottle for my mom to drink with Lin.
They both liked it. There's a glass left and I am finishing it. Is good. Do you want a Cab with a lot but not quite too many flavors? Then this is the yes.
And the label. So do you like Georgia O'Keefe? TWS does, a lot. Her history, her photography, but mostly her later works. Desert vagina flowers! That phrase, though - I feel dirty about it because her paintings are uplifting and this strange little blog is kind of the opposite of that.
TWS feels that Ms. O'Keefe was one of the most important painters of the 1900s. Go wank off, Post-Expressionist and Abstract-Impressionist dudes, maybe move to Detroit with the rest of the Bauhaus. We will have a conversation about how art should be uplifting and pretty, and I'm just not sure that you have much to contribute.
Okay, Klee. You can stay. Kandinsky's got to go, though, and Picasso is Right Out. I suppose Dali can stay but let's get him a Chupa Chup so he'll shut up and sit over there. And Monet? Good to see you! Mr. Dali would like to offer you a nice lolly while the adults talk.
Anyway. Why bring Ms. O'Keefe up? Because TWS once had a difficult day in Chicago seeing a painting of a horse skull, which engendered a lot of Big Feels for TWS in their proto-wine days, causing a Big Fight with a person who TWS had previously thought was 'a hottie'.
The Dark Horse label is like a Georgia O'Keefe painting, with a wine glass instead of a flower, stylized into a graphic. That might sound like a deprecation of corporate art, but I'm kind of in love with it the more I look at it.
Dark Horse's whites are crap so don't drink them unless you need to. I give any of the Dark Horse White Wines a score of 'cheated on in Chicago'.
But you do not need to. Their reds, though - universally pretty good. I give their reds 'Desert Flowers' out of 'Pretty Things'. Buy and drink this wine, yo.
Comments
Post a Comment